Thursday, November 29, 2007
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
I am starring in a new reality TV show!!!
Yep. It's true. I am now starring in my own TV show. Actually, I have been on it for a while now from what I can tell. I'll call it the "Carlo Monte Show"(it doesn't have a title yet). I don't remember signing a contract or waiver for this show but maybe I was drunk or something when that happened? I also don't see any cameras or crew, but they are probably hidden really really well. It also seems there is no promotion for the show, so I have to promote it myself here on myspace. Anyway, the basic premise is constantly annoy me with some wacky situations to see if I can keep my cool. I am sure to everyone watching it's a laugh riot. Some of the funny highlights of season one include:
- I'm hungry! Let's go to a drive-thru! Watch the hilarity ensue when someone pulls right in front of me at the drive-thru window and takes forever to order because they do not know what they want and need to look over the menu, even though most of the menus have not changed since dinosaurs roamed the Earth. LOL! Will I just park the car and go in or will I ram the person's car? TUNE IN AND FIND OUT!
- I need to pick something up at the store! Damn, someone just beat me and my one item to the counter! Their bill is $5. Here comes the coupons! Here comes the credit card and/or checkbook! LMAO! Will I take their stuff and throw it on the floor while cutting the line or will I wait patiently and curse myself? TUNE IN AND FIND OUT!
- I used to park for free, but the Stop and Shop manager has now decided to take back the parking lot! Now I have to pay for parking which will cost me an extra $75 a month. Damn! Another person beat me to the "I feel like working about 65% of the time" parking machine! It's high comedy when they cannot insert the dollars correctly or want to pay for 12 hours of parking with nickels. Will I go into Stop and Shop and snap kick the new manager in the throat? Will I give the nickel person a UFC-style chokeout? TUNE IN AND FIND OUT!
- Damn, traffic on the I-95 again! Luckily, I start on the service road. Oh, everyone gets off the highway onto the service road to beat the traffic! Wait, now there's traffic on the highway and the service road! It's OK because I have a secret way to go to work even though it sucks that it's only one lane. What's this? A senior citizen has gotten in front of me! Wow, such a safe diver. He likes to go 20MPH slower than the posted speed limit. God bless him. Will I attempt to pass him and risk a head on collision or will I just follow him and catch up on some sleep. TUNE IN AND FIND OUT!
Some may call it a knock-off of MTV's "Boiling Points" but that's not true because I never win any money on this show, which sucks. There IS the possibility that everything that happens to me is bad luck/divine mandate, but that is just pure lunacy if you ask me. I'm a strong believer in the whole reality TV thing.
PS
Just wait until Season 2! It will even better as it follows all of the crazy happenings of my nightlife and some of the kooky characters I have come to know and love!
- I'm hungry! Let's go to a drive-thru! Watch the hilarity ensue when someone pulls right in front of me at the drive-thru window and takes forever to order because they do not know what they want and need to look over the menu, even though most of the menus have not changed since dinosaurs roamed the Earth. LOL! Will I just park the car and go in or will I ram the person's car? TUNE IN AND FIND OUT!
- I need to pick something up at the store! Damn, someone just beat me and my one item to the counter! Their bill is $5. Here comes the coupons! Here comes the credit card and/or checkbook! LMAO! Will I take their stuff and throw it on the floor while cutting the line or will I wait patiently and curse myself? TUNE IN AND FIND OUT!
- I used to park for free, but the Stop and Shop manager has now decided to take back the parking lot! Now I have to pay for parking which will cost me an extra $75 a month. Damn! Another person beat me to the "I feel like working about 65% of the time" parking machine! It's high comedy when they cannot insert the dollars correctly or want to pay for 12 hours of parking with nickels. Will I go into Stop and Shop and snap kick the new manager in the throat? Will I give the nickel person a UFC-style chokeout? TUNE IN AND FIND OUT!
- Damn, traffic on the I-95 again! Luckily, I start on the service road. Oh, everyone gets off the highway onto the service road to beat the traffic! Wait, now there's traffic on the highway and the service road! It's OK because I have a secret way to go to work even though it sucks that it's only one lane. What's this? A senior citizen has gotten in front of me! Wow, such a safe diver. He likes to go 20MPH slower than the posted speed limit. God bless him. Will I attempt to pass him and risk a head on collision or will I just follow him and catch up on some sleep. TUNE IN AND FIND OUT!
Some may call it a knock-off of MTV's "Boiling Points" but that's not true because I never win any money on this show, which sucks. There IS the possibility that everything that happens to me is bad luck/divine mandate, but that is just pure lunacy if you ask me. I'm a strong believer in the whole reality TV thing.
PS
Just wait until Season 2! It will even better as it follows all of the crazy happenings of my nightlife and some of the kooky characters I have come to know and love!
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